Sunday, July 25, 2010

Wasted Sparkles

My ears are still hurting and a CT scan shows I have a complete blockage in one of my sinuses, which the Dr. recommends having surgery to open and drain it.  Oh and while he's in there he wants to fix my deviated septum.  This was all pretty heart breaking to hear.  I got this news last week and am really mad about it since I truly believe this is all due to the sinus rinse I did (because the Dr. told me to).  Now here I am with ears that constantly hurt and I get dizzy/nauseous all the time. 

I decided to go on the Vegas trip and have a good time since the surgery will not be fun and it will take a little while for me to recover.  The Dr. said I could have pain during the flight, but that there is no risk of bursting an ear drum or doing any damage.  My plan was to go and have a great time, then come home to deal with the surgery.  Well...I made it to Vegas, but came home the next day.  I just wasn't myself the day I arrived.  I had an very early flight and had taken lots of medicine to avoid my ears hurting during the flight.  I was really tired all day, but at least I wasn't dizzy.  I waited until dinner time to have any alcohol since I didn't want it to mix with the medicine, but it appears even this was a bad idea.  As soon as I started drinking, I got dizzy.  At one point I felt as though I was falling back in my bar stool, when in fact I wasn't moving at all.  I didn't let on though since I didn't want anyone to worry about me.  Then we got to dinner and I knew I was in trouble.  Just being in a restaurant made me nauseous and it was even worse when the food came.  I couldn't eat anything.  I got down about two bites of soup and one bite of rice.  I took the nausea medicine to help my stomach, but still couldn't eat and was still dizzy.  I tried my best to fake feeling better, but knew I was bringing down the mood at dinner since I was just sitting there looking and feeling horrible.  After dinner I was still dizzy, but not nauseous.  I did get in some good gambling time in the afternoon and after dinner.  I learned a couple new games too.  I lost money at the new games, but won it all back pretty quickly once I got to the blackjack table.  Once I won my money back it was time for bed.  The next morning I woke up with a horrible headache and was dizzy.  I really didn't want to have another day and night trying to hide how I was really feeling so I decided to go home.  This all just made me really sad because through all the medical problems I've had over the last two years, somehow my body holds it together for me to have fun on vacation...but not this time.  I cried all morning just over being so sad that not only I have not felt well for going on two years, due to one thing after another, but now my favorite thing, traveling, has been taken from me as well. 

I had a great outfit on Friday night...very Vegasy and not something I can wear anywhere else.  Sequin skirt, shoes with rhinestones and a sequin purse.  All wasted sparkles.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Wow, that is awful.. you had to be feeling pretty bad to leave Vegas early :( Maybe when the surgery is all over and you're on the mend, you can celebrate with a new trip! Feel better soon. I hope things start looking up for you.

Laura said...

Oh that sucks. I totally feel for you. You've had a tough couple of years.
I've had to cancel two vacations due to health reasons so far and it sucked so bad. I just had to cancel my 5th anniversary trip because the doctor was worried the baby was ectopic and didn't allow me to travel. Guess what? He was wrong. One cancelled vacation later...It's not like he gives a crap.
I hope you feel better soon.

JennK said...

Sorry to hear girl! Hopefully after the surgery you will be yourself again!